Alyssa's Baby Registry

Note from Alyssa and Matthew:

"Mrs. Goat: “Honey, we’re going to have a baby!” Mr. Goat: “You’re kidding.”"

Note from Alyssa and Matthew:

"When Chuck Norris was a baby, he didn’t have teddy bears. You know why? He had real bears"

Note from Alyssa and Matthew:

"Why did the baby cookie cry? Because its mom was a wafer (away for) so long!"

Note from Alyssa and Matthew:

"Why did the baby sleep with his eyes half open? Because he was keeping a close eye on his dreams!"

Note from Alyssa and Matthew:

"“Sleep-deprived parents: because dark circles under your eyes are the new fashion statement.”"

Note from Alyssa and Matthew:

"What did the fire say to her husband after their son’s birth? “Honey… this is Arson”"

Note from Alyssa and Matthew:

"Diaper changing is an art form, and I’m the Picasso of poop!"

Note from Alyssa and Matthew:

"Why did the baby tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing!"

Note from Alyssa and Matthew:

"Where do baby cats learn to swim? The kitty pool"

Note from Alyssa and Matthew:

"Why did the man bring his pregnant wife a small lizard? She told him to pick up a baby monitor"

Note from Alyssa and Matthew:

"Little Johnny’s new baby brother was screaming up a storm. He asked his mom, “Where’d we get him?” His mother replied, “He came from heaven, Johnny.” Johnny exclaimed, “Wow… I can see why they threw him out!”"

Note from Alyssa and Matthew:

"How did Batman decorate baby Robin’s crib? With a bat mobile"

Note from Alyssa and Matthew:

"Tell me, does the stork deliver babies with their diapers on? No, they’re stork naked!"

Note from Alyssa and Matthew:

"What did the buffalo say to his baby boy when paternity leave was over? “Bison!”"

Note from Alyssa and Matthew:

"Did you hear about the baby born in a high-tech hospital? It came out cordless"

Note from Alyssa and Matthew:

"Midnight Blue"

Note from Alyssa and Matthew:

"Color- Midnight Blue. I think the hospital accidentally switched our babies at birth… They’re identical twins, so it’s hard to be sure"

Note from Alyssa and Matthew:

"How can you tell the gender of a baby? If he cries it’s a boy If she cries, it’s a girl"

Note from Alyssa and Matthew:

"Medium size please Do you know what a baby computer calls his old man? Data!"